Our lives are no different from the exemplars of the past. We have deep faith and trust much of the time, but we also find there are moments of doubt -- when we wonder if there is any truth at all in what we have been taught to believe so tenaciously. We also know that while we want our lives and words to be marked with kindness and love, we are sometimes so angry we could spit! And, often we do. We say mean things to those we love; we accuse, demean, and blame. We feel like Mt. Vesuvius ready to launch brimstone on anyone in our path.
The truth is that we will have times of doubt, and we will find anger boiling up within us. So, I've written and recorded two prayers today that I hope will help you during those times. Below you will find the prayers in audio and written form. Blessings and love!
A Prayer for When You are in Doubt
O God, I don't even know if you're there. I don't know if you're really real. I know I'm supposed to believe and most of the time I do. Still, there are times, like now, when I fear that I'm merely saying I believe because I can't face the terror of not believing. If you aren't real, what hope can I cling to? Yet, it you are real, where is the proof that will ease my doubt? Show my soul a sign of your presence. Give me eyes to see, ears to hear, and the courage to claim what is mysterious and often beyond my reach. I ask this for the sake of your love. Amen.
A Prayer for When You are Angry
O God, I feel clenched and tight inside -- as if every muscle, every fiber of my being is twisted and taut. I want to scream, or punch, or curse -- just do something that will release the energy waiting to explode inside me. I know that unleashing words will give me momentary relief, but words alone will not change the cause of my anger. Push the light breath of your Spirit through me and let me draw in that breath that has the power to soften and unwind my charred emotions, until I reach the edge of peace and stillness. I ask this for the sake of your love. Amen